This is a guest post by Tina Benigno, who will be running the Rock’n’Roll SanDiego Marathon on June 5, 2011 for Team in Training.

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At the age of fourteen, my best friend was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. At the time she was undergoing treatment, there wasn’t much I could do except be there as her friend. Thanks to research on leukemia and lymphoma, my friend has been in remission for over thirteen years! Unfortunately, not everyone has the same story. A little boy whom I used to coach in gymnastics passed away from leukemia a few years ago at the age of four. I knew his family, and the thought of what they endured breaks my heart. Also, my sister’s boyfriend’s father passed away from Leukemia last year. This winter I decided that I could actually contribute to the leukemia and lymphoma research that enabled my friend to be in great health for so long now!

I was already a runner training for my first marathon when I received a Team in Training (TNT) pamphlet in the mail this past January. On a whim, I signed up for an information meeting. I had been contemplating joining a running group, so when I learned that TNT would offer the support of a team, the guidance of a coach, and the opportunity to contribute to a cause I have always believed to be a worthy one, I knew I wanted to be a part of the group.

Though I have been running for a year and a half, my perspective on running changed over a year ago when my younger sister was diagnosed with Ewing’s sarcoma. I had begun running as a way to improve my health and mental functioning. Rarely did I think of my sheer ability to run as a motivator to do so. The treatment my sister underwent was aggressive and involved several months of chemotherapy as well as surgery to remove most of her femur, replacing it with a donor bone. The surgery left her unable to walk at the time and we knew it would be a long process for her to be able to be fully mobile like she used to be.

Running took on a different role in my life. I would run because I could. Seeing the effects of chemo on my sister’s body reminded me of how fragile life is, but also how resilient – both mentally and physically – we can be. Thanks to cancer research, my sister has been in remission for several months now. As I am training for the marathon, she is learning to walk again.

Advances in blood cancer research are crucial to improving treatment of all types of cancers. I am delighted to be a part of the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society of Canada’s Team in Training, raising funds for such a wonderful cause.

“Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.” -Goethe

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If you, or someone you know, is Running for a Reason, please send your story to webeditor@irun.ca and we might feature it right here on this blog!

I remember watching an episode of Oprah years ago when she was talking about instinct. There were some women on her show who had been attacked or assaulted and they all said the same thing: they had ignored their original instinct about the situation.

Although I’m no die-hard Oprah fan, that spoke fairly clearly to me. Your gut reaction to someone or something is worth not ignoring.

As I got ready for my long run this morning (29k), I realized that this whole marathon training makes me consciously go against what seems like the right thing to do. I make myself go against my instinct.

It didn’t seem like a very good idea to go for a three hour run on a day when there was a wind and rain warning, but I made myself.

It didn’t seem like the smartest thing to keep running at 10k when my knee started twinging, but I did.

It really didn’t seem like a good idea to choke down those absolutely horrible gel packs, but I did.

And then! When it was finally all over, and I was one big toe into an ice bath, I thought, Girl, you’re nuts. That was perhaps the worst idea of all.

So why do we do it? Why do I do it? Something that makes me uncomfortable, something that feels “wrong”?

There’s no logical answer, and I guess that’s because training for a marathon isn’t logical. It’s hard and painful and at times really foolish. It rules your life (or at least mine) when you run more than 50km a week. Life begins to revolve around long runs – you are either recovering from one or mentally preparing for one. It’s killer on your social life, because running hungover sucks and too much restaurant food can play havoc on your intestines.

In January, I loudly claimed that this would be my last marathon. I would get my goal and reach my potential and then I’d be done. And that is completely untrue. Because nothing I have ever done in my life gives me the sense of accomplishment and power and belief in myself that long-distance running does.

I’ve run multiple 5k’s and 10k’s and half marathons and even a really awesome triathlon last summer. I’ve had great races and I’ve had miserable races and I know that I am who got myself through (however slowly at times) each and every kilometre.

When I’m 15km from home, I feel very alone. I run along a road boarder by the ocean. I look at the waves and the ducks and the ice and sometimes stop and peer down into the surprisingly clear water to see what’s there. I make a conscious decision to keep running when my legs are tired. And that conscious decision to keep going transcends into other aspects of my life.

The last 7k of my run is uphill and it’s so hard, every time. Today, my quads were burning and I was tired. But every week, after I get home and think about that hill, think about that 7k, I am proud of myself. Because I choose the route and I choose to run and I choose to keep going.

My first marathon was a completely profound experience for me. I broke down the barriers of what I had perceived as my limits. When you take away your limitations, do you know what is left? Infinite possibility.

The second time is proving to be no less powerful, just at a time when I really needed something to remind me of how strong I am. I broke down my limitations last time, and this time I’m starting to see just how far I can go.

In 2004 I ran my first half marathon (it was the first Bluenose Marathon). My parents wanted to come up to cheer for me but I discouraged them. I didn’t want to make a big deal about it. I had actually never run a race before, but it seemed silly to ask them to drive all the way to Halifax only to see me run for ten seconds. So they didn’t.

I crossed the finish line with no one I knew present. Hopefully you’ve never had a similar experience, but it’s a pretty lonely and anti-climactic feeling. I stood around for a few minutes after the race and then walked home (sad trombone).

Sucky, yeah, but definitely a lesson learned. I never, ever discourage anyone from coming to cheer at a race now. Even my younger brother who wants to fly from Vancouver to watch me run Ottawa, I was honest and told him I’d love for him to be there. My parents will go and my kids and husband will be there. It makes a big difference to know that there are people cheering for you specifically.

Last week I was feeling pretty grumpy about the whole running thing. Tired, cranky, busy in other aspects of my life… for whatever reason, I wasn’t feeling positive. I started speed training and it sucked. I wrote a bad exam. My legs were heavy on my weekly Wednesday 8k, you name it.

But yesterday, I met with my new personal trainer for the first time (I say new, but we’ve actually known each other for a long time. He used to train my varsity rugby team waaaaaayyy back in my undergrad days). I plan on seeing him once a week for the next ten weeks. After our session yesterday, I was re-enthused. Sure, my butt and hamstrings can definitely attest to the fact that he’s no slacker, but it feels like I just let one more person into my corner.

I signed our contract, but not before pointing to the part of it that claimed not to guarantee results. “I want results. I want 4:15,” I told him. He scoffed at it and said, “With me, there are results.”

And I believe it. Because I’m letting people into my cheering section, and because I have an awesome trainer, but mostly? Because I want it so, so bad. And I truly believe that I will achieve it.

Designing training programs to suit three very different runners all begins with a deep dive into their running lives.  Aleks, Brock and Chrystal may have traits and challenges which are similar to other runners in iRun nation but each makeover athlete is a unique runner in body and in lifestyle.  I knew that we could make their running dreams come true but we had to ensure that the training programs accounted for their normal life and commitments. As well, the goals and program had to be realistic for their current fitness level while pushing the envelope to see what they were capable of over a twelve week block.

To get the ball rolling, I asked a lot of questions and made Aleks, Chrystal and Brock go away to do some homework.  We took a look at their running and injury histories including personal bests and their best-ever training blocks.  In some cases, this was an easy task if logs had been maintained.  In others, we had to work from a vague recollection of past training and race outcomes.  I wanted to know what elements of their training really worked for them and what elements were a struggle.  This is an important and challenging exercise – to quote Chrystal “you ask hard questions”.

Next, we had to determine current fitness.  I asked about their last race and training block.  What had they done over the holidays and the following month – very specifically what took place in the last three weeks?  Were there any niggly injuries which limited their training?  I find that if an athlete is not logging their data and workouts, the training load may be overestimated.  I was curious about how they handled the tough winter weather – had they packed it in or found a treadmill?  Winter is a great time to do cross-training, injury management and strength building so I was hoping that this was already part of their week.

As a working athlete, I appreciate the challenges of fitting an exciting but daunting training program into an already busy life with set commitments.  The athletes needed to consider how the training and recovery would fit into their busy lives for a 3 to 4 month window.  As a coach, I wanted to know what challenges lay ahead so that the program could be modified to optimize training by finding the days when each athlete is freshest or with enough time to complete a full workout.

Finally, Aleks, Chrystal and Brock told me about their running dreams.  I completed my assessment and I believe that the dreams are achievable – but all three athletes are in for a surprise!  Their new running life is not what they had expected!

Conducting Your Own Personal Assessment

Pull together the following information:

• Most recent best training block log or transcribe from memory
• List of personal best times, dates, locations
• Outline / log of your training in the past 3 weeks
• Total years of running
• Injury and injury rehab/recovery history
• Regeneration techniques you use regularly (sleep, hot tub, massage…etc.)

Now sit down and spend 30 min reviewing the information.

Ask these questions:

• Why do I think my best training block was my best training block?
• What worked for me and what didn’t seem to work for me during the time window?
• Could I recreate this training scenario again or has my life changed significantly?  What would I do differently this time?
• Do I have recurring issues, such as a specific injury or time constraints, which always seems to ‘pop up’ and impact my training plans?
• Which experts could help me diagnosis and solve this problem – sport doc, nutritionist, cleaning service, professional organizer?
• How many days of running can I realistically handle each week based on my body and schedule?
• How could I fit a strength training/boot camp session in each week?
• How could I fit in a yoga/pilates session in each week?
• What could I do to better measure my workouts (distance, pace, heart rate)?

Take action – start with one of these action steps to get started on setting your goal and plan for the spring:

• Consult with a sport doc or sport medical practitioner regarding ongoing discomfort or injuries.
• Map each day of the week, list commitments, and select lock-down training times.
• Select an option for capturing your training log – paper, web or hand-held app.

Personal note:  As an elite athlete I perform this assessment process on my own performances and program at the end of each year.  I review my training logs and data to find trends.  I even review my Visa statement to get a clear sense of the true cost of injury prevention, race events and training.  My schedule is dissected to establish where and why I fell down on my training load; what worked and what didn’t.  It is all reconciled with my performances for the year.  A new improved plan is developed for the next year.

Hello, iRun nation !  It’s a very bright and beautiful Monday morning in Toronto but too cold compared to what we expect for this time of year.

Hopefully, spring is around the corner !

Being one of the iRun makeover contestants, one of the questions that I get asked by people is “How did you get started on this path” ? Or, “What made you start to run” ?  Well, I have been told that that is an interesting story and is very similar to alot of peoples’ life experience but unlike alot of people, I found a way to deal with the problem. You see, the problem was an over-stressed lifestyle.

About 4 years ago, I was in my early forties and employed with a fabulous company that satisfied my creative and professional bent but the job was long hours full of stressful phone calls with clients trying to close a sale; if the sale did not happen, I didn’t get paid; simple as that. What could be more stressfull ?  I was sitting on my duff and not exercising at all but not eating well either.  I had a sedentary job but I had always been naturally slim and had a small appetite and I thought that I could eat any food if it was once per day only (no breakfast or lunch – only dinner). But, I was steadily gaining weight and feeling more and more lathargic, tired and had noticed that I didn’t “bounce back” from an arduous day as easily as I once had. What the hell was wrong with me ? I knew that the stress factor of my job was the culprit and so I embarked on a campaign of “wellness” and “relaxation”. Candles and incense were purchased and used everynight after work, long hot baths in the tub were indulged in, wonderfull 9 hour sleeps every night as well.  I tried all of these alone and together to lower my stress levels and too regain my stamina. To no avail.  The results were temporary at best and at worst, made no difference at all. I thought of starting Yoga classes but decided to try a more frequent and enriched sex life as that was a great stress reliever too (unfortunately,  my husband benefited more from that than did I !)  No success …what was I going to do ? Did that really mean that I was going to have to try “gasp” exercise ?! OMG !! Not that ! hahha…I had never excersised a day in my life per se.  I mean, I had grown up on a farm up north and by its nature, farming is a very physical way of life but I had not been active in grade or high school sports or anything else after finishing highschool. My idea of exercise was running to the Holts sales rack or to my favorite shoe store to get the last pair of heels in my size !

One day, in January 2006, I was walking home from work and saw a stationary bicycle thrown out on the curb. It had two pedals and two handles and not much else; no speeds except ridiculously easy and hellishly hard but it was clean, white and best of all : free ! So I lugged it home and hauled it up the stairs to the master bedroom and the very next day (following some sort of imaginary New Years’ Eve resolution) got on that bike and pedalled for 5 minutes and promptly thought that I would die ! Right then and there ! I had never sucked air so hard or so fast ! Of course, I had had no cardiovascular exercise in about 25 years and my body was screaming at me ! But, I persevered : 5 minutes, 7 minutes, 9 minutes and more. I began to be aware of what I ate and how much;  I started to educate myself about calories, carbs, protein and fat intake. By God, I thought,  if I am going to work this hard, I’m not going to let it go to waste for stupid empty calories !  By the spring, I could pedal on my little bike for half an hour at a time and the pounds were melting away; ten down from January but mostly I think due to my strict diet of not eating anything that “my grandmother wouldn’t have recognized” diet. No processed foods – at all.  No cheese, no red meat, no pop, no white bread, rice, pasta, no desserts, no alcohol, no pre-prepared food. I made everything from scratch or ate it whole or fresh.

Spinach and brocolli were my best freinds as well as fresh fruit, chicken and fish.  By May, I was tired of the bike and looked around for something else to do and I realized that I could put on a pair of running shoes and go out the door at any time and run down the street.  So, I did that and ran from Broadview to Pape subway stations along the Danforth; I found out that the distance was 1.1 kilometres oneway; double that for 2.2 or triple it for 3.3….now I was interested but not hooked. It was hard running; much harder than I had thought.  I felt as if I was back to those first days on the bike….sucking air and managing only 1 or 2 Ks before I had to stop. But I am a very determined woman and I kept at it if only because I felt that this could be my last chance to “make a difference in my physical life” as it were.  Twice per week,  I would lace up my shoes and go out and run 2 to 4 K and once I ran 7 K all on my own, however, I knew that I could not go much further on my own (running by yourself is very boring if you have no idea what you are doing and have no clear goal to strive towards).  I needed help.

So, fast forward one more year during which I struggled with running;  I picked it up and let it go then picked it up and let it go again. Winter came and went (who runs in the wintertime ??!! ….only crazy people you know !)

Another springtime and another oppurtunity. Whatever cardiovascular benefits I had gained from running have surely been wasted by now…I have to start from the beginning ! I had seen a yoga place that offered running clinics in the neighbourhood and had wondered about them. But surely this is a place were “runners” and “athletes” go;  not people like me.  If I were to go there, I would get laughed at;  wouldn’t everybody realize that I couldn’t run more than 4 K without getting winded ?

Stay tuned …for the next part of this personal journey……

Here is the official video from the 2011 Chilly Half Marathon held in Burlington on Sunday, March 6.  Look closely to see footage of Tania Jones, Ed Whitlock and Jefferson the Dog, among others!

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXklsMxF5_s&feature=youtu.be

Hello, iRun nation !  It’s a very bright and beautiful Monday morning in Toronto but too cold compared to what we expect for this time of year.

Hopefully, spring is around the corner !

Being one of the iRun makeover contestants, one of the questions that I get asked by people is “How did you get started on this path” ? Or, “What made you start to run” ?  Well, I have been told that that is an interesting story and is very similar to alot of peoples’ life experience but unlike alot of people, I found a way to deal with the problem. You see, the problem was an over-stressed lifestyle.

About 4 years ago, I was in my early forties and employed with a fabulous company that satisfied my creative and professional bent but the job was long hours full of stressful phone calls with clients trying to close a sale; if the sale did not happen, I didn’t get paid; simple as that. What could be more stressfull ?  I was sitting on my duff and not exercising at all but not eating well either.  I had a sedentary job but I had always been naturally slim and had a small appetite and I thought that I could eat any food if it was once per day only (no breakfast or lunch – only dinner). But, I was steadily gaining weight and feeling more and more lathargic, tired and had noticed that I didn’t “bounce back” from an arduous day as easily as I once had. What the hell was wrong with me ? I knew that the stress factor of my job was the culprit and so I embarked on a campaign of “wellness” and “relaxation”. Candles and incense were purchased and used everynight after work, long hot baths in the tub were indulged in, wonderfull 9 hour sleeps every night as well.  I tried all of these alone and together to lower my stress levels and too regain my stamina. To no avail.  The results were temporary at best and at worst, made no difference at all. I thought of starting Yoga classes but decided to try a more frequent and enriched sex life as that was a great stress reliever too (unfortunately,  my husband benefited more from that than did I !)  No success …what was I going to do ? Did that really mean that I was going to have to try “gasp” exercise ?! OMG !! Not that ! hahha…I had never excersised a day in my life per se.  I mean, I had grown up on a farm up north and by its nature, farming is a very physical way of life but I had not been active in grade or high school sports or anything else after finishing highschool. My idea of exercise was running to the Holts sales rack or to my favorite shoe store to get the last pair of heels in my size !

One day, in January 2006, I was walking home from work and saw a stationary bicycle thrown out on the curb. It had two pedals and two handles and not much else; no speeds except ridiculously easy and hellishly hard but it was clean, white and best of all : free ! So I lugged it home and hauled it up the stairs to the master bedroom and the very next day (following some sort of imaginary New Years’ Eve resolution) got on that bike and pedalled for 5 minutes and promptly thought that I would die ! Right then and there ! I had never sucked air so hard or so fast ! Of course, I had had no cardiovascular exercise in about 25 years and my body was screaming at me ! But, I persevered : 5 minutes, 7 minutes, 9 minutes and more. I began to be aware of what I ate and how much;  I started to educate myself about calories, carbs, protein and fat intake. By God, I thought,  if I am going to work this hard, I’m not going to let it go to waste for stupid empty calories !  By the spring, I could pedal on my little bike for half an hour at a time and the pounds were melting away; ten down from January but mostly I think due to my strict diet of not eating anything that “my grandmother wouldn’t have recognized” diet. No processed foods – at all.  No cheese, no red meat, no pop, no white bread, rice, pasta, no desserts, no alcohol, no pre-prepared food. I made everything from scratch or ate it whole or fresh.

Spinach and brocolli were my best freinds as well as fresh fruit, chicken and fish.  By May, I was tired of the bike and looked around for something else to do and I realized that I could put on a pair of running shoes and go out the door at any time and run down the street.  So, I did that and ran from Broadview to Pape subway stations along the Danforth; I found out that the distance was 1.1 kilometres oneway; double that for 2.2 or triple it for 3.3….now I was interested but not hooked. It was hard running; much harder than I had thought.  I felt as if I was back to those first days on the bike….sucking air and managing only 1 or 2 Ks before I had to stop. But I am a very determined woman and I kept at it if only because I felt that this could be my last chance to “make a difference in my physical life” as it were.  Twice per week,  I would lace up my shoes and go out and run 2 to 4 K and once I ran 7 K all on my own, however, I knew that I could not go much further on my own (running by yourself is very boring if you have no idea what you are doing and have no clear goal to strive towards).  I needed help.

So, fast forward one more year during which I struggled with running;  I picked it up and let it go then picked it up and let it go again. Winter came and went (who runs in the wintertime ??!! ….only crazy people you know !)

Another springtime and another oppurtunity. Whatever cardiovascular benefits I had gained from running have surely been wasted by now…I have to start from the beginning ! I had seen a yoga place that offered running clinics in the neighbourhood and had wondered about them. But surely this is a place were “runners” and “athletes” go;  not people like me.  If I were to go there, I would get laughed at;  wouldn’t everybody realize that I couldn’t run more than 4 K without getting winded ?

Stay tuned …for the next part of this personal journey……

My baby, or more accurately, my youngest, is almost three. In June, 2008, when she was six weeks old, I buckled her up in her car seat and lugged her to our first Weight Watchers meeting. I had no idea that “trying to lose my baby weight” would evolve into a profound journey of self discovery.

As required, I set myself a short-term and a long-term goal. I diligently counted points and measured my servings. I balanced the delicate art of losing weight and maintaining a good enough milk supply for my voracious eater. I jogged, around our neighbourhood and eventually farther. And when my girl was four months old, I ran a 10k.

I lost all the extra weight I had gained by the time she was seven months and scored myself a lifetime membership to Weight Watchers. I even ran a half marathon. I had achieved my goals! Except for one problem. I still wasn’t satisfied.

The number on the scale hadn’t magically made my stretch marks or that crazy wrinkly skin on my stomach disappear. My mid-section was still squishy. When I looked at my body, I didn’t really like what I saw. But how was this possible? I weighed what I wanted! I’ve never been great at math, but I had obviously miscalculated this equation. 138lbs did not equal happiness. And it was supposed to.

Fast forward two years and I’m here to tell you: Throw out your scale.

There will be no one single achievement that will make you happy or like yourself more if you can’t love yourself today.

My husband is the strongest, fastest man I know (and if you’re questioning my objectivity right now, you should, because my unabashed love and pride of him completely blinds me. But! He does run an 18 minutes 5k and can do 40 pull up, so he’s pretty awesome). He was looking at himself in the mirror last night and commented that he could see parts of his body he’d like to change. I shouldn’t think those things, he said, It’s not fair to myself.

Easy to rationalize for a guy who has about 8% body fat, right? Except that statement is applicable to everyone. I’d love for the skin on my stomach to magically snap back to the firmness it had pre-children. I’d like to be one of those people that complains about how it’s soooo haaaard to gain weight. You’d probably like to run faster or have more dedication or to be thinner or stronger or smarter or better at balancing your demanding job with everything else in your life.

When you look at your body and think about what you’d like to change, ask yourself why you feel that way. I’m here to tell you (and I will preach it for the rest of my life) that losing 10lbs (or 20 or 100) is not going to solve your problems. Losing 10lbs is not going to fix your relationship. It is not going to get you promoted. Realistically, it will get you a new pair of pants and that’s it.

I’m not saying that it’s not ok to lose weight in a healthy way or even to want to. I’m saying that you need to love yourself. You need strip off and look at yourself naked in the mirror. You need to look at every scar and mole and stretch mark and accept it as part of who you are – part of a beautiful and strong and determined person.

The road to self-acceptance and self-love is not an easy one (trust me, I’m on it). It’s full of bumps and set backs and times when you’re tired of trying to be right with yourself. It’s ok to cry, to lay on your bed and sob. But you can get back up. You can get out for a run. You can let go of that magic number on the scale that you think will bring you happiness. You can learn to believe in yourself.

You can learn to believe in yourself.