I don’t like to be told I can’t do something

May 14, 2015

Krysten Siba Bishop of Toronto, Ontario is a great example of someone who refuses to be impacted by her health challenges; instead, she is motivated by them. She gathers strength from adversity and refuses to be idle. On May 3, she ran the Mississauga Half Marathon as her first race back after pacemaker surgery. Please join iRun and Saucony as we proudly congratulate Krysten as she is today’s #FindYourStrong hero. This is Krysten reporting on her race:

Sunday’s Race requires some context.

I had surgery five months ago. It was my seventh surgery and my fourth in the last 3 years (two for my double mastectomy and two for maintenance on my pacemaker/defibrillator). Medically it has been quite the adventure, and running has become an integral part of my mental and physical recovery plan.

I was diagnosed with an arrhythmia known as Long QT Syndrome when I was just 17 years old. I got my first pacemaker/defibrillator a few months later.

I don’t like to be told I can’t do something, and I especially don’t like to feel like I am losing. And there was a time where I felt like I was fighting a losing battle against my own body. Running was my way of fighting back.

Running gave me my health, and I felt empowered.

This is probably also how I ended up running my first half marathon the day before my preventative double mastectomy.

It was a slightly crazy scheme, but I was looking for a happy distraction. I crossed the finish line that day to remind myself that despite my flaws, despite the challenges that lay ahead, I had a body that was strong and capable. I was left with a newfound respect for my health and my body’s ability to preserve. And I knew I was hooked.

There have been many moments over the past few years where I have found myself questioning my strength, even questioning my sanity. There were moments where I felt beaten. There were moments where I felt broken. There were days when burying my head under the covers seemed like the only action I could muster.

But I kept training. Even your worst run is better than no run at all. And I made a promise to myself, that even though things were hard, I would keep going. Even your worst day (and I have had a few of those) is a blessing. And I would keep moving forward.

Sunday was another step forward.

I was nervous about the race. I had built this day up in my mind. I wanted to come back to running strong. But I knew I had a shortened training season — just 11 weeks of consistent training. And I wasn’t sure how my body would hold up.

I was hopeful and a little trepidatious as I got myself situated in the corral. I have trained and rebuilt so many times over the last few years, so I wasn’t sure what to expect as the gun went off. But I promised myself that I would run hard and be proud of whatever time the clock read when I crossed the finish line.

I started out strong. The net downhill course probably helped with this. The 10km clock read 58:19 as I ran past. This put me on track for a personal best, if I could maintain this pace. But as the course flattened out and the lactic acid built up in my quads I felt my pace slipping. My endurance is still a work in progress.

I did my best to dig deep and crossed the line at 2:06:58.

And while that was not a personal best, I still felt incredibly proud of the result.

This race was a testament to the hard work I had put in over the past few months. Despite my short training period, I was only 1 minute and 17 seconds slower than I was when I raced this time last year, after a full a year of rehab and training. I finished feeling happy, healthy, and strong. And after just a few months you can’t ask for too much more than that.

My body and health is always a work in progress, but Sunday was a celebration of the journey. Please know where ever you are, whatever kind of journey you are on, anything is possible when you #FindYourStrong.

Looking for more motivation? Read additional #FindYourStrong stories here.

Mizumo Wave Rider is a consistent runner

TheBuzzonGear

May 13, 2015

7.8oz; neutral shoe; hard carbon rubber outsole in heel; soft rubber in forefoot

Looking for more stability from your shoes? With this shoe’s added structure, Mizumo Wave Rider, may be worth a test run.
By Carrie Snyder, Photo by Darren Calabrese

This is a neutral shoe with a snug fit. I wore it doing running intervals on an indoor track, and took it outside in the snow and ice a few times. I found it a stable shoe that nevertheless had enough give from heel to toe to allow my foot to move comfortably. On my runs, I appreciated the good arch support and firm lateral structure; however, the mesh front doesn’t provide much protection for the toes. My feet got cold. If you’re not running in the dead of winter, however, this is a problem easily avoided. Overall, I rate this as a safe, steady partner of a shoe.

Find more of Carrie Snyder’s shoe recommendations in the April issue of iRun. And remember always test out any pair before you make your final decision.

Go Ahead, Just Breathe

Jennifer Perrault

May 11, 2015

Breathing is currently a pretty trendy topic. While our breathing is an automatic response that our body performs, by focusing on breathing techniques, runners can reap many benefits. Though it seems obviously simple, it’s a very important skill for athletes to have.

It is hard to speak about breathing without speaking about yoga. As part of my cross training, I love to cycle and practise yoga. For my first outdoor yoga class of the year, I rode my bike to a park in the city and enjoyed every second of a yoga class under the sun. It was impossible to count how many times the teacher instructed us to breathe. I also cannot believe how many “breathe” tattoos I see at yoga studios. I do have to admit, breathing is not over-rated.

When a runner is nervous or stressed, there are many detrimental physiological responses that occur, including an increase in breathing. When stressed, an individual’s heart rate goes up, breathing increases, muscles tighten, more oxygen is sent to the legs, sweating increases and body temperature decreases. These responses were designed for our ancestors to run from or fight a predator. In today’s world, these responses usually create a negative spiral of thoughts in runners and are of little benefit to a long distance runner.

Stress can occur right before a race, right before a run or during your work day. Not only do our bodies’ responses causes negative thoughts, but it takes a lot of energy to be stressed; this leaves less energy for running, working and enjoying life. If you can control your breathing, you can gain more control over your stress. Focusing on breathing, for at least five minutes, is beneficial either an hour before a race or a long run, or the night before or after your race or long run.

Here are some tips to help you de-stress through breathing:

1) Put one hand on your chest and one of your stomach, feel your chest fill up first and then your stomach while breathing.

2) Breathe in for a count of four seconds and breathe out for a count of six, resulting in six breaths per minute.

3) Start by breathing for five minutes a day at six breaths per minute, then gradually increase to breathing for ten to fifteen minutes a day.

4) If you find it difficult to focus and are distracted by your thoughts, say to yourself “I am breathing in, I am breathing out”

Simple One Breath Relaxation

When feeling stressed at work or feeling overwhelmed during a run, utilize one breath relaxation by taking in one deep breath before you continue what you’re doing. Breathing for five to 15 minutes will help your body recover from stress that is currently occurring or stress that occurred that day; leaving you with even more energy for running.

Jennifer is a former gymnast turned sprinter turned middle distance runner. She recently completed a Master’s in Human Kinetics at the University of Ottawa where she studied sport psychology. She holds a Bachelor Degree in psychology from the University of Western Ontario where she was captain of the Track and Field team. She continued her running career with the Gee Gees and is the 2012 Canadian Interuniversity Sport Champion in the 1000m. She is passionate about bringing athletes to a new level of performance through mental skills training. Jennifer believes that enhancing mental performance is about sharpening these mental skills to help athletes constantly challenge themselves to be better.

Connect with Jennifer on Twitter, @jen_perrault!

Make Peace with Your Sheets

Training

May 11, 2015

By Joanne Richard

Poor sleep is nothing to yawn at – it takes a toll on our mind, mood and miles. There’s really nothing else that kills your ability to function quite like a lousy night’s sleep. Actually sleep deprivation has been deemed a national health epidemic – five million of us will have trouble sleeping tonight and be tired tomorrow.

“For optimal health and fitness, you have to sleep on it,” says Barrie Shepley, runner and trainer of elite athletes at Personal Best. “Longer sleeps and naps is what lets the elites train harder and recover faster.” According to Shepley, a former Olympic coach, rest is critical to performance. “Sleep is one of the most effective ways for a hard training athlete to recover. The biochemical adaptation that occurs during sleep is as important as the actual workout to improve performance.”

Fatigued cells and systems need sleep to regenerate, says Shepley. “Whether it’s a nap or a full night sleep, your least expensive training aid you can do is simply to get some more sleep.”

Most of us will spend an average of more than 10,000 full days of our lives sleeping — or at least trying to fall sleep, stay asleep or worrying about not sleeping! So if you’re wired, tired and sleep deprived, wake up and tame those sleep saboteurs with our exhaustive A-to-ZZZ’s guide of tricks and tips to get the sleep you’ve always dreamt about.

Sleep is a glorious thing – bring it on!

33. Do the most boring thing possible at night.

32. Read your old chemistry textbook.

31. Play tic-tac-toe with yourself

30. Put yourself to sleep reading about biomechanical risk factors for patellofemoral pain in distance runners

29. Bore yourself half to death thinking about your mind-numbing, dull day.

28. Rub a bit of Vicks Vaporub on the outside of your nostrils to help you relax.

27. Go for a long car ride – it will often induce sleep. Just don’t be driving!

26. Get in the driver’s seat by exercising. It’s quite possibly the panacea for all that ails you, including sleeplessness. “Data suggests that the more regular exercise you get the more you improve sleep quality,” Dr. Michael Breus says.

25. Aim for 30 minutes, four times a week of heart-pounding activity.

24. Run early. “Exercise stimulates the body to secrete the stress hormone cortisol, you should try finish exercising at least three hours before bed,” says Stephanie Langlais, holistic health coach in North Vancouver.

23. Move every day. Walk, run, hike, snowshoe, swim, climb, pump iron. Just do it!

22. Up it! “Anytime I up my physical activity, I sleep hard and well at night,” says Barrie Shepley.

21. “50 burpees a day keeps sleeplessness away,” says personal trainer Lisa Moore, of fitnessonthego.ca.

20. Train for a half marathon.

19. Take up trail running.

18. Break in the new Montrail FluidFlex ST, lightweight and has a forefoot trail shield.

17. Go hard with Josh Hewett’s home workout: 10 lunges per leg, eight burpee pushups, 10 prisoner squats (hands behind your head), and eight superman’s per side (on hands and knees, extend opposite arm and leg). “Repeat as many rounds as possible for 15 minutes,” says the personal trainer at top-form-fitness.com.

16. Unwind with hot yoga and sleep longer and harder.

15. Exercise your foam roller every night to reduce unwanted muscle tension and joint stiffness, says Dr. Jeff Cubos, a chiropractic sports specialist at jeffcubos.com.

14. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate.

13. Mind your Pee and Q’s – no water too close to bedtime or you’ll need a bathroom break. Totally disruptive.

12. Avoid overtraining. The flood of adrenaline can over-stimulate and bring on sleeplessness.

11. Train your body to sleep. Set a regular wake time and intended bedtime. “Actual time doesn’t matter but the regularity of it does… We need to regulate our bodies’ natural rhythms,” says sleep training consultant Tracy Braunstein.

10. Let Sleepyti.me bedtime calculator let you know when to go to bed.

9. “Go to bed later, not earlier – many people get in bed too early and their biological clock does not want to sleep. Then they get frustrated and cause autonomic arousal, which prevents sleep,” says Breus, aka The Sleep Doctor.

8. Set an alarm for bed time instead of waking time to help keep a regular routine for getting in bed, says Sheldon Persad, co-owner of P.B. Health & Performance Inc.

7. Aim for the sleep sweet spot; research suggests that the best restorative sleep happens between 10 p.m. and 2 a.m.

6. Avoid the nap trap – late afternoon naps can be a sleep wrecker.

5. If you must, have a short siesta between 1 p.m. and 3 p.m.

4. Do not sleep in on weekends. This messes with your sleep patterns.

3. Do not let teens go out on weekends or you’ll never sleep.

2. Okay, compromise. Set an early curfew – say, 9 p.m. “Rested teens make for a happy household,” says Dr. Carl Pickhardt, adolescent psychologist. “Sleeplessness in families – in teenagers and adults – can be very psychologically costly.”

1. Don’t have kids! “Kids are amazing, awe inspiring and very fulfilling but they don’t contribute to a regularly awesome sleep life,” laughs celebrity chef, runner and dad of four Roger Mooking.

Find more sleep secrets and late-night essentials inside the April issue of iRun.

Brooks PureConnect 4 both brilliant and neutral

TheBuzzonGear

May 11, 2015

6.6oz; high arch; neutral, minimalist profile

When it comes to your kicks, choosing fashion over function isn’t a winning decision. But this pair from Brooks combines style with a comfortable fit, making it easy to have it both ways.

By Carrie Snyder, Photo by Darren Calabrese

Let’s admit that sometimes we’re drawn to a shoe because it’s got flash. This stylin’ shoe is colourful, bright, fun and earned a whole lot of notice from friends in my spin and weights class. As I laced up in the change room, they said, “Whoa, new shoes? Sweet!” and “Hey, I’d wear those!” The tread has excellent grip, a must-have when swinging kettle bells at 6 a.m. As for running, at 6.6oz this shoe is feather light, extremely flexible both heel to toe and across the midline, and makes me speedy, or gives me the illusion that I might be. Either way, the big support beneath the arches and the snug fit of the spongy body are super-comfy. Given the thin profile of the soles, I felt surprisingly well-supported while running. I’ll wear this shoe for shorter distances or to train on the track. Not for those with flat feet or who need support at the ankles.

Find more of Carrie Snyder’s shoe recommendations in the April issue of iRun. And remember always test out any pair before you make your final decision.

Alicia Woodside On Outdoor Exploration

Anna Lee Boschetto

May 8, 2015

Along with her recent charitable work, Alicia Woodside of North Vancouver, B.C. has several tips for trail and ultra running. From equipment to nutrition to fitting in fitness, Alicia is clearly a dedicated woman of the great outdoors.

iRun: What is Dash for Dogs all about?

Alicia: Dash for Dogs was a 5k and 10k in Stanley Park, in support of the British Columbia & Alberta Guide Dogs. It was a unique format in that it was an e-race, so participants could use the RunGo App to guide them along the 5k or 10k route. We hosted 150 runners and raised $2,800, of which 100% was donated to the Guide Dogs.

iRun: Tell us about the RunGo App.

Alicia: RunGo is the cool local tech company where I’m currently working. We make an app for iPhone and Android that gives you directions for road and trail runs so you won’t get lost. It uses GPS and a custom voice system to tell you the next time you have to turn, so you can explore some really cool routes without worrying about getting lost. A great thing is that it’s just GPS so it doesn’t use data or wifi to guide you. Using it on the Howe Sound Crest Trail helped me finally do that trail without getting lost. for the first time ever! Anyone who knows me understands that this is quite a feat.

iRun: What is your involvement with Girls Gone Wilderness?

Alicia: Girls Gone Wilderness came about to help make mountain sports accessible to young women through fun social outdoor experiences. We wanted to create something that would be super approachable to all young women, something that anyone can join something fun, light, and accessible. To do this we decided to create a welcoming and inviting social gathering that was immersed in nature; we hosted a “trail party”— a fun point to point hike, with 45 people! It was so much fun. We took a school bus to the trail, complete with music, pizza, Vega energy shots, and sweet MEC prizes.

Along the hike we hosted a limbo contest, gave out electrolyte jello shots, and we even had a surprise hot chocolate station and goodie bags at the end! We were so surprised— despite the horrible downpour conditions, we sold out and got tons of happy hikers!

iRun: Describe the training process you go through for ultra distance racing.

Alicia: I run in places I love, with people I love, in the style I’m craving that day. Some days I crave a long, chill trail run, other days I crave a balls-out tempo run with Vancouver Falcons Athletic Club (VFAC) and there are some days when I’m just strapped for time and I solve that by run-commuting. (I should admit I live near Grouse Mountain so it becomes a solid 10 mile trail run. Running with the laptop sucks though!)

As I got into running ultras, my Sunday long runs became weekend “adventure runs”— instead of distance and pace, it became about a destination, a journey and a fascinating place that inspired us. It’s really freeing. Except, we tend to get home in the dark, all the time. I also find that now, everything can be considered training. Ate too much before a run? Perfect ultra training! Sleep deprived? That’s also great. It’s kind of awesome, now there is always a positive spin to something that could be negative. (No, I am not drunk right now.)

iRun: In terms of nutrition, what is your eating plan when you’re training?

Alicia: I’ve learned to eat lots of variety. I never would have thought I could eat a quesadilla while running, with all that cheese and stuff, but I was introduced to that at Cascade Crest 100, and that was the only thing I could eat! I’ve tried everything from savory baby food to pop tarts; those experiments were sort of gross. Because I’m running for such a long time, it’s really important to me to try to eat some real, healthier foods; otherwise I would be eating junk all the time. These days, I sometimes make my own granola bars, which I adapted from an amazing volunteer at the HURT 100 race last January. They’re full of real foods, things like berries, nuts, peanut butter, oats, and a bit of salt. I’m also on the Bremner’s Race Team now so I’m hoping to start downing lots of organic blueberry products on the run!

iRun: As an ultra runner ,what one item couldn’t you run without?

Alicia: Socks! Ouch, that would suck! Also clothing…I wish I had it in me to do the Bare Buns Run, but I don’t think I do! More seriously, I wouldn’t run on trails without my favourite flashlight. I heard from North Shore Search and Rescue that not having a light is the number on reason why they have to rescue people. Having it gives me peace of mind to carry it and allows me to extend my run if I want without worrying.

iRun: Whats next for GGW?

Alicia: Our first event went really well, so we’re going to bring it back and make it even better than before! We’re hosting a summer kick-off party on June 19th – 21st, and again there will be a school bus and a fun social experience outside. This time we will also introduce a really fun follow-up, with mini workshops held on the Sunday of the same weekend, where all of our new friends can come back and practice intro mountain biking, all-levels of trail running and hiking, and Stand Up Paddle boarding. Again, prices will be really accessible, gear and equipment will be readily available, and transportation will be provided. We’re facilitating everything that a young woman needs to start falling in love with mountain sports. We will be posting details about our Summer Party soon on our website, at www.girlsgonewilderness.ca.

iRun: What’s your next race?

Alicia: I was really lucky to qualify for the World Trail Running Championships in Annecy, France, so I get to go and run my favorite style of race— a beautiful mountain 85k run with tons of climbing, overlooking Lake Annecy— and I also get to represent Canada! It’s a huge privilege that I live a life where I get to invest so much of my free time to run and race around the world! And, my sister lives in Europe so I get to spend some amazing time relaxing with her in the French Alps after the race!

Saucony’s Triumph ISO is a flexible fit

Training

April 28, 2015

9.0oz; 29mm heel; 21mm toe; designed for road or track; high arch; neutral, cushioning profile

With the spring racing season kicking into high gear, for the April issue of iRun Carrie Snyder tested out multiple pairs of shoes, and gave the rundown on the top picks. And remember always test out any pair before you make your final decision.

By Carrie Snyder, Photo by Darren Calabrese

THE RUNDOWN: “You finally found a shoe as bright as your sweatshirt,” observed my trainer, Phil, who likes to bug me about the fluorescent yellow garment in which I frequently turn up for boot camp. And it’s true. This shoe will knock your eye out. It’s become my go-to shoe for boot camp and spin class — the thick sole, though quite pliable, offers just the right amount of support for the foot. I really like running in this shoe too: it’s got a comfortable, cushy feel, and fits snugly around the ball of the foot. The lacing is slightly eccentric, with a support cage that “floats” over the body of the shoe, which apparently allows for a “foot-hugging feel” (so says the marketing material). Overall, I feel speedy and contained (or perhaps hugged) and definitely highly visible when running in this shoe.

Destination Racing for the Very First Time

AttheRaces

April 24, 2015

Although she has participated in events from 5K fun runs to full marathons, Anna Lee Boschetto has never run a race outside of Ontario. Here’s what happened when this first-time destination runner kicks it at the Samsung Marathon in Tel Aviv.

I’m curious by nature, adventurous by choice and always up for travel, but these days my parental status means that I weigh my decisions a little more carefully than I did when my life wasn’t filled with the joys of two children. Still, the winds of January whistled out my window and snow swirled across the front yard. I was dizzy with excitement at the thought of escaping this frigid Canadian winter. Running a half-marathon in shorts, against the backdrop of the Mediterranean Sea? The children would be in good hands with their dad, and my morning running routine needed a change of pace, one that didn’t have me trudging through snow and negotiating icy sidewalks. I decided to run a half marathon in Tel Aviv.

A UNESCO World Heritage Site, Tel Aviv is an active city that’s a sports-minded person’s dream destination. It’s not uncommon to see runners, cyclists and roller bladers, along the boardwalk that spans the coastline at 1 a.m. Tel Avivians also take surfing pretty seriously, with several beachside surf schools. Add in an immaculately maintained boardwalk that weaves along the seaside from the restaurants and shops in the Tel Aviv harbor to the historic area of Jaffa, there’s so much to explore that it just makes sense to be out there for a half marathon.

As my plane landed in Tel Aviv, I could feel the warmth of the air on my face even before I stepped out of Ben Gurion Airport. When my tour guide Ari told me that it was unseasonably warm for February, I didn’t think much about how this climate might affect me on race day. To be honest, I didn’t really notice the heat all that much, even on race day, and that’s one of the cool facts about a destination race: it gives a few unexpected twists and turns to your usual running perspective.

After a couple of critical health situations in 2014, officials for the Samsung Tel Aviv Marathon bumped the date up to late February, banking on cooler temperatures. That didn’t exactly work out, but by adjusting the marathon, along with the other race start times by an hour, the majority of the 2,300 marathoners and nearly 9,000 half marathoners had a reprieve from the heat.

With the course weaving along the Mediterranean, the warmth of the sun mingling with the salty sea air, the view is exactly what you’d picture on a post card; a turquoise sea, meeting an endless skyline that’s dotted with cumulous clouds. Under the shade of the olive trees that line Sderet Rothesechild Boulevard, I’m making my way to the turnabout while high-fiving with the children who are cheering along the way. Doing so not only reminds me of my own daughters at home, but it also has me reminiscing about my own childhood spent cheering for friends and family at sporting events and how great it feels to be acknowledged. I make a mental note to do this wherever I’m running next.

Whether it was the shade, the crowds or the postcard views, I didn’t notice the rising temperatures, until the homestretch, more like the last three kilometers. At that point, I could practically hear my skin sizzling in the sun and I’m pretty sure that if I had cracked a raw egg onto the pavement, it would have promptly sizzled, too.

Nevertheless, crossing that finish line after grinding out those final kilometers, I was beaming. It wasn’t my fastest run, but by far it felt like one of my best. Maybe it was the flavour of the lemon popsicles that were given out at the finish line or the Sprite and potato chips that I chowed in lieu of a sports drink and banana in the post-race tents. Even days later, my post-race satisfaction was at an all-time high.

Like most runners, I’m a little type-A, which means that I wasn’t convinced that I could dial it back, put the time goal out of my mind and basically run like a kid. And I know we can’t all jet off to far off destinations for every running event, but it’s worth indulging your wanderlust now and again. Whether it’s the waves crashing against the rock cuts or the endlessly winding trails, sometimes you’ve got to get away to put it all in perspective.

Kate Van Buskirk: How I Unlocked the Ultimate Me

CelebrityTreads

April 24, 2015

Kate Van Buskirk won bronze for Canada at the 2014 Commonwealth Games. She’s currently training for the 2016 Rio Olympics.

I’m sitting on the covered patio in front of our condo in Scottsdale, Arizona sipping on a post-run coffee and stretching my tired legs out on the chair across from me. I gaze down at my sunburnt thighs, a reminder of how close we are to the unrelenting sun. Its hard to find shade in the desert and most of my runs trace the canal systems that cut like veins through this arid land supplying water to the cities and farms, the life blood of the Copper State. I’m getting darker every day, and the tan lines that give away every athlete are becoming increasingly pronounced: sports bra, shorts, compression socks, sunglasses, watch. My body is a patchwork of white and brown; Canada and Arizona.

Training in the American southwest is a new experience for me. Each winter for the last three years I’ve traveled to Florida to escape the snow and cold for a few weeks, but the best early season races are in California so basing in the neighbouring state makes far more sense. March in Scottsdale, April in Flagstaff, May in California…not a bad way to welcome spring! The cacti and sunbeams make for a pretty spectacular setting and my body seems to appreciate it as much as my mind does. Each workout is faster than the last, and it’s relieving to feel my fitness coming around. There are few things that I love more than being right in the thick of a training cycle, churning out 120km weeks, inching closer to race pace, ending my days exhausted, exhilarated and hungry for more. This is the good life: when the body is fit and healthy, the mind is tuned in and the heart is full.

But it isn’t always this way.

Every track and field athlete in Canada will face a laundry list of obstacles throughout their athletic career that make them question their commitment to this sport: injury, illness, a crushing loss, a disappointing season, nomad’s fatigue, being flat broke, the internal debate between sticking it out for one more year or just moving on to a real job already. Knowing that these experiences are shared by our tight-knit community of athletes provides some solace, but as we watch more and more of our friends walk away from the track and move on to start families, careers and RRSP’s, its hard not to wonder if this pursuit is worth the sacrifice.

Like most elite athletes, I’ve dealt with each of the aforementioned challenges. And, as I’ve realized is also true for many athletes, these challenges have been compounded by anxiety and depression. My struggle with mental illness seemed in its worst moments like the thing that most defined me, even as I was experiencing the greatest athletic success of my collegiate career. In my last year at Duke I set an NCAA record and 3 Duke school records, earned 2 All-American titles, anchored our Blue Devils to a 4x800m victory at the Penn Relays, and ran personal bests just about every time I stepped on the track. I was being recognized as one of the top mid-distance runners in the NCAA in the same semester that I was struggling to get out of bed or attend classes. I was both protected and terrified by this image, constantly afraid that the grand illusion would be shattered and my vulnerable side would be revealed.

One of the greatest and most counterintuitive things I’ve learned in the 4 years since returning home from university is that the more vulnerable I’ve allowed myself to be, the stronger I’ve become. Just like the injuries, the illnesses, the financial stressors and the uncertainty about the future, the more I’ve talked about dealing with depression and anxiety the more I’ve found support, understanding and community. I’ve gained a wealth of knowledge about myself as an athlete and as a person, and I’ve equipped myself with information and tools to move forward on this journey as peacefully and optimistically as possible. And I get more excited about the journey every day.

I vividly remember a workout that I did at the Chinguacousy Park track in my hometown of Brampton when I was in middle school. I was preparing for the North American Hershey Track and Field Games, by far the biggest race of my young life. I was running 400m repeats and my dad was coaching me; other than the two of us, the stadium was empty. As I began my last interval, my dad told me to imagine myself running the best race of my life, and to use this as motivation to finish the workout as fast as I could. I’m sure he intended for me to envision myself competing well at the Hershey meet, but the image that came into my 13 year-old mind was of crossing the finish line at the Olympics. I had no real frame of reference for this other than what I’d seen on TV, but as I rounded the final turn on the track I pictured a stadium roaring with energy, me wearing a Canadian racing kit, and the Olympic rings above me. At 13 I knew innately that I wanted to be an Olympian, and that desire has fuelled my athletic drive for the last 15 years.

The Rio 2016 Olympic Games are now just over a year away, and the excitement builds with each passing day. But while my dream of becoming an Olympian has intensified over the years, it now shares its spot in my heart with other experiences and desires. Over the last decade, I have had the great fortune of representing Canada at 8 major international events and each has brought me enormous pride, extraordinary learning opportunities and memories that will stay with me throughout my life. Competing at the Olympics would surely be an unparalleled experience, but it would be just one set of memories within a much larger anthology that will collectively define my athletic career.

I’m also never navigating this journey alone. I have such an enormous love affair with the running community, who constantly surprises and inspires me, and which cannot be adequately described as anything other than an awesome, giant family. I feel this community beside me every time I lace up my shoes, and the tremendous sense of purpose that this brings helps to keep me grounded. Through the successes and the disappointments, I am buoyed by my love for my sport and the people who comprise it.

There is always something to look forward to, and before the Olympics can fully enter my radar, I have this summer’s Pan Am Games and World Championships to prepare for. Neither team will be announced until late June, so for now I’ll run through the desert, my head full of dreams, my heart full of love, and my body readying itself for whatever the next step may be.

9 Sleeps Away From Her First Marathon

Ben Kaplan

April 22, 2015

Angela Hamill is a 43-year-old mother of two and in ten days she’ll run the GoodLife Fitness Toronto Marathon; the first marathon she’s ever attempted. We’ve been training together for nearly a year and she’s the only one from the original Couch to Marathon clinic that will be lacing up for the marathon starting line. Think you might have the stuff to take on a similar journey? Here, Angela talks about what it takes not to quit.

iRun: We’re less than two weeks away from your first marathon. How do you feel?
Angela: I’m overwhelmed with emotions right now, but the two that stand out are excitement and anxiousness.

iRun: Where are you confident and where are you a little less so?
Angela: I’m confident that I will excel at carb-loading. I’m a little less confident about running 42.2.

iRun: Do you have a race strategy for the big day going in?
Angela: Stay positive. Fuel early and often. And maintain forward motion, no matter how difficult it gets.

iRun: Talk about your training. What was your longest run? Do you feel adequately prepared?
Angela: Training has been a roller-coaster of ups and downs, both physically and mentally. I’ve tried to be as consistent as possible, getting out to run at least 3 times/week and as many as 5. My longest run was 33km, but I’ve only done 4 runs longer than the half-marathon distance. Strangely enough, I do feel prepared. I feel I’ve done the best possible training I could given the resources, opportunities, and circumstances I faced along the way.

iRun: What prompted you to begin this course last summer?
Angela: I was sick pretty much the whole winter before the course started, and I was looking for a way to get in shape and stay healthy. I knew I liked running but I was having a hard time motivating myself, so when I heard about the course I was immediately intrigued.

iRun: Where were you at, personally, and what attracted you to the idea?
Angela: There’s always a lot going on in my personal life. My husband and I are constantly chauffeuring our two boys to their activities and social engagements. Plus, we stay connected to our own friends and families as much as we can. My parents live far away, and I was visiting them a lot to help out. I saw this course as an opportunity to do something for myself, to challenge myself, and to do it with the help and support of a group.

iRun: Tell me a little bit about your journey. Did your confidence grow with the increased distances?
Angela: I’m a worrier by nature, so I gravitate towards the safe and familiar. Committing to a marathon was a large and scary step outside my comfort zone. I started to feel a lot of pressure, but it was all self-imposed. A big part of this journey for me has been learning to relax. As soon as I let go of the worry and the pressure, I was free to savour each moment as it happened. The joy in those moments helped me push myself a little further. And the further I pushed, the more confidence I gained.

iRun: Was the marathon something you kept in mind or tried to forget about?
Angela: I’ve always considered the marathon my “goal race” so it was definitely on my mind. I knew I would drive myself crazy if I thought about it too much, so I just tried to focus on one day and one run at a time.

iRun: How did it effect your relationships?
Angela: A positive side-effect of this experience has been the lessons I was inadvertently teaching my kids. For example, they saw that you don’t have to be a superstar at something to find happiness in it. They also realized that you can do anything you set your mind to, even if it doesn’t come easily. My oldest son, Owen, told me he was impressed that I had the “stamina” (his word, not mine) to run a marathon. At this point in his life, I’m mostly an embarrassment to him, so hearing him say that he was proud of me for taking this on really meant a lot!

iRun: As the course went along, we trained through a very cold winter. Did you ever have thoughts about giving it up?
Angela: I got sick twice this winter, probably because I pushed my body too hard in extreme conditions. The first time I missed 10 training days, the second time I missed a week. I also tore ligaments in my toes while running on a snowy, slippery sidewalk. So yeah, I certainly considered throwing in the towel. In the end, it was the advice, support and encouragement of the group that helped me stick with it.

iRun: Are you someone, in general, who would describe themselve as “tough”?
Angela: Nah, I wouldn’t say “tough.” Maybe stubborn and determined are better words to describe me.

iRun: Does running get easier as you go along?
Angela: It gets easier as your body, lungs and mind adapt. There will always be runs that feel more difficult than they should, but those runs should not define or discourage you.

iRun: What advice would you give a new runner?
Angela: Enjoy the process. Trust your training. Stay positive. Find support, either with a local running group or through the larger online running community.

iRun: You’ve already run 5K, 10K and the half marathon. Which of those three events gave you the most profound experience: can you talk about your experiences with racing?
Angela: I had done a few running events prior to joining this group, so I knew what racing was like; the excitement and energy of it all. But I ran most of those events alone. For me, our first race (A Midsummer Night’s Run 5K) was the most memorable, simply because I knew so many people participating! I loved the feeling of community, and cheering on everyone I knew.

iRun: We only had something like seven weeks between the half marathon and the marathon. Finishing the half, did you feel like that would be enough time?
Angela: From day one, I wondered if the two months between Chilly and Goodlife would be enough. I feel better about it now but in an ideal world, I would have liked another month to get ready for the full.

iRun: What does it take to train for the marathon? Do you think its something that anyone could do?
Angela: If you’re like me (i.e. not super-speedy) it takes a lot of time to train for the marathon. But if you have desire, passion and willpower, you’ll make the time. So go for it!!

iRun: Finally: Who will be watching you on race day? What do you want to tell your loved ones who might be cheering you on?
Angela: My husband, Mark, and my two kids, Owen and Emmett, will be looking out for me on race day. I want to tell them, “I love you guys so much. I couldn’t have done this without your love and support.”

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