Today I was reminded how crazy this sport is. It’s an obsession, an addiction, a way of life and very dramatic. Another long run in the books. After two stressful weeks with a lot of commitments that I agreed to, resulting in stress which resulted in poor sleep which in turn resulted in two weeks of terrible runs and workouts and so on and so on… I need to work on setting boundaries. Especially when my mental health gets affected and then my running takes a hit and it all begins to fall apart.
However, being the stubborn person that I am, I kept showing up. Day in day out, one foot in front of the other. Get out there and at the very least put in the effort. Today it was windy, but the temperature was mild and the sun was shining bright. I actually wasn’t planning to do my long run today, but I’m working tomorrow so I had no choice: Friday it is. Boston being a treacherous course with all the uphills and downhills requires you to come in prepared. So off I went to High Park where I included Ellis Park Rd, a 1K uphill to my loop. I went out in what I thought was a decent effort only to find myself flying. What is going on? OMG, I’m back.
Yes . . . this is what happens when you keep showing up and putting in the work. Of course the last two 5K of my 4x5K’s were tough. But there is progress.
Today was a huge reminder of what the marathon will feel like in those last kilometres. Your mind is telling you to stop, that you can’t run another step, or to just stop and call it a day. Each step feels like a stab and like the next one will be the last because you will collapse and be unable to finish. But I did finish and never went under the pace I set out for the workout. Of course I stepped to the side like the decent person that I am as I thought I was going to vomit hunched over next to the closest bush I could find. But I did it.
Good things happen to those who wait and put in the work.
My boyfriend reminded me the other day that I’m not a robot and that I’m not perfect. Tough words but I needed to hear that. We won’t always get it right. But he reminded me that I need to be happy with the effort I put out.
So when things aren’t going as well as you like, keep moving forward. In life and in the marathon. Like today, I lost count of the times I wanted to stop but I didn’t. I kept going. I kept believing that my legs wouldn’t fail me. The fear we feel is mostly not based in reality. One way or another most of us will cross the finish line. We get to our destination because we keep going.
Although I was reminded today of the pain I will endure in less than one month at the Boston Marathon, I was also reminded that I will get through it, one way or another I will cross that finish line.
