This spring, iRun will be sending one employee to the Scotiabank Calgary Marathon from Toronto, yet there are two iRunners who very much want to run. In an ongoing alternating column, Ben Kaplan and Sabrina Young will be stating their case, which you folks—dear readers—will vote upon who gets the prized ticket. This week, Ben Kaplan offers 49 sweet reasons why you should pick him.
49. My kids are 6 and 8 and still sleep in our bed in Toronto.
48. Calgary is not in Toronto.
47. Once in Alberta, I promise to recycle all of my beer cans.
46. And only drink local beer.
45. Also, oh yeah, I will be running. A lot. And quickly.
44. Pretty quickly. Who knows. My training hasn’t been going that well.
43. I will run with Calgary’s run crews and learn from them.
42. Including the team at Frontrunners, an inclusive group who seems to have the right idea.
41. In fact, I’ll contribute to Calgary’s local economy and buy something. Maybe I won’t buy $300 sneakers, but I’ll at least buy some race gels for my 50K.
40. That’s right. I’ll be running the 50. You think Sabrina Young is going to run that far?
39. So, it’s not that you should pick me and not Sabrina because I can run further than her and faster than her. I’m just saying. I can.
38. SO. MUCH. FASTER.
37. SO. MUCH. FURTHER.
36. And I’ll give high-fives throughout the race.
35. Do people in Alberta like that? I feel like it’s popular in Ottawa and Toronto, but in Vancouver, I didn’t get that many high-fives at the Vancouver Marathon.
34. Maybe the Ontario vibe doesn’t translate in British Columbia or, actually, I think at the Vancouver Marathon I had to walk and so had my head down and so maybe didn’t try any high-fives.
33. If you pick me, I will give out all the high fives.
32. Though not too many. Nobody likes an annoying runner.
31. I promise I won’t scare little children or old men.
30. I even got along with Rob Ford.
29. I just want to experience the splendour of Calgary’s scenic course and festive atmosphere.
28. I want to drink in the pristine Alberta skyline and dream moodily on a runner’s high bliss about that glorious finish line.
27. I’m originally from Brooklyn, New York. I’ve never even been to Alberta.
28. I’ve never touched down in Edmonton.
27. Or seen the power of Red Deer. The majesty of Medicine Hat.
26. Is Medicine Hat majestic? See, the world can open up for a young man and I’ll impart my learnings on my poor children. (Maybe that will get them to sleep in their own beds at night).
25. Do it for my kids.
24. My kids need to know the Calgary Marathon is Canada’s longest running marathon.
23. That there’s a 5K walk and 50K ultra, and also relays and a kids run.
22. How can my kids grow up in a world without their dad seeing, with his own eyes, the Scotiabank Charity Challenge? Which every year raises millions of dollars for so many great people.
21. I just have to go to the Calgary Marathon and drink in the Expo.
20. In fact, if you pick me and not Sabrina Young, who cuts in line at the end of her races and steals extra bananas, I will give everyone a free copy of the new issue of iRun.
19. That’s right: pick me and receive a free copy of the May print edition of iRun magazine.
18. Even more: pick me and I’ll put you on the cover of the May edition of iRun magazine.
17. All you need to do is pick me. And you will be happy. And rich. And thin. And qualify for Boston.
16. So do not pick Sabrina. Who I once saw cut in line at a race expo to get John Stanton’s autograph.
15. John didn’t say anything. But c’mon. What’s fair is fair. Wait in line like everyone else!
14. On behalf of John Stanton, pick me.
13. And do it for the children.
12. Children everywhere.
11. Because the Calgary Marathon has amazing volunteers and a fast course and it’s growing so quickly in stature and buzz. The Calgary Marathon is every Canadians bucket list race.
10. I will literally die of FOMO if you don’t pick me.
9. Does the above picture not look like the face of a man who gives anything less than his all?
8. So we’re getting to the end of this list and I hope I’ve made my case:
7. The Calgary Marathon is awesome.
6. It’s fast. It’s fun. It’s celebratory. It gives back to the community and it has one of Canada’s leading green policies.
5. Frankly: I think all of us should run this amazing race.
4. But unfortunately, as of February 19, 2020, only one lucky iRun staffer will be making the trip.
3. For the high fives I will give; the dollars I will spend, the magazines I’ll distribute and the race I will run, I humbly think, dear reader, you should pick me.
2. Plus, Sabrina wears race shirts before she actually runs the race.
1. How can you vote for a monster like that?
Bothof you should come & run Calgary!