I sat my legs down for a little chat the other day. A performance review, if you will.
I said, “legs, we need to talk. I was disappointed with your performance today.” They just looked at me in disbelief, so I went on. “Today was supposed to be our long run. Key words were Long, and Run. I know it has been a rough week, but we only went 2/3 of the distance we discussed.”
My legs looked at each other, then at me, and said “you’re not serious.”
I said, “Yes, I am serious! Two-thirds of the distance, and you complained the whole way. Now, I am in charge around here, and…” At this point my legs cut in. They said “Listen here! With all the cutbacks around here, you’re lucky you got that much out of us!”
It was my turn to stare in disbelief. “Cutbacks?” I asked.
“Let’s start with rest,” said my right leg. “We did the hardest boot camp workout we’ve ever done two nights ago, then yesterday morning you dragged us out for a not-so-easy run. Then tonight you want a long run? When will it end?”
Then my left leg chimed in: “And what about fuel? I don’t know what all that garbage you have been shovelling in your face lately is, but it sure isn’t fuel!”
My right leg cut in again. “And when did you stop drinking water? We might as well be the Tinman after a rainstorm!”
Then out of nowhere my right foot added, “you could have stopped for a second to dump that big, sharp rock outta my shoe, too.” Followed by my lips, with: “is it too much to ask to get a little chapstick around here?”
“Okay, now you’re all just ganging up on me,” I pouted.
My left leg said, “seriously, if you’re in charge around here, you need to act like it.” My right leg advised, “we can’t meet your expectations unless you give us the resources we need.” My stomach growled loudly. The rest of my body murmured in agreement.
So it’s a good thing we had that little talk. I left the meeting with a few action items:
- Even when life is hectic, I will try to get adequate rest and fuel, and stay hydrated.
- When that fails, I need to adjust expectations accordingly: be prepared to go slower, take walk breaks, or cut it short.
- And most of all, quit blaming my body for not performing when it’s my own fault!
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Haha! That was clever! I’d be afraid to have a meeting with my body parts, in case they all decided to go on strike.
lol very nice…skin is still bitching about that time we went out with only spf15 on a spf50 kind of day…and don’t get me started about the day I forgot the
” body glide ” …there where some sensitive conversations that day I’ll tell you… ; )
At least you can talk to YOUR body….mine just keeps saying “that’s nice”. 😉 Good blog. 🙂
I’ve been to those meetings. It’s like herding cats. I did 22.5km on Sunday and my underarms piped up for the first time ever. Apparently, they want special treatment in the form of Bodyglide. But instead of bringing this up before it became a problem, they decided to start screaming after things were already a mess. Sometimes I’m impressed that the entire body can pull together at all. Good luck with yours!
We’ll find out tonight if they are happy with you…I just don’t want them talking to my legs and letting them know the power they have!!
Very good, Karen!