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    An open letter to Santa Claus

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    Dear Santa,

    I’ve been a very good runner this year.  I actually adhered to a training program for the first time in my life (most of the time anyway).  I often sometimes turned down a second  fourth cookie.  I did most of my tempo runs even though I hate those suckers. 

    In light of these good behaviours, I request the following items for Christmas. 

    1. A new PR in the 10km.  The one I’ve got now is three years old and was set at non chip-timed event.  I’m not being greedy:  it doesn’t have to be sub-40.  Sub-60 minutes would be wonderful, thanks.
    2. Good weather for key races in 2011.  I’ll send you a list of race dates once I’m registered but what I’m looking for here is 10-20°C, overcast, no wind with maybe a little sprinkling of rain half-way through to cool me off.  None of that 30+°C with a blazing sun crap I had this year at the Chocolate half-marathon.
    3. A cure for my side stitch.  Santa, I’ve consulted medical experts.  I’ve asked every athlete in the Ottawa area.  I even turned to magic this summer and it still won’t go away.  I think you’re my only hope.  Anything you could do here would be greatly appreciated.
    4. Running tights that don’t make me look like too much sausage in too little casing.  Maybe you could liase with the product developers and tell them most runners have over 5% body fat.  I’m not asking for Heidi Klum’s legs, I just don’t want to scare children. 
    5. Better Gatorade flavours.  Do you think you could pull off a beer flavour, Santa?

    Don’t feel you need to bring them all.  I know your sleigh is probably filled with running shoes, water bottle belts and technical clothing for all the other good runners out there.  I hope you enjoy the pasta and Gatorade I left for you.

    Yours truly,

    The Shuffler

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    Dana’s first attempts at running started at age 15, prompted by the desire to impress a boy. “Thankfully, the boy in question appreciated her other charms and running was quickly abandoned,” she says of her younger self. The habit finally stuck about two years ago, however, and she has since co-founded a two-person running team called “The Fighting Mongooses.” Dana offers great advice in her blogs, such as to think twice about the Toronto Zoo 10k. “A strong whiff of elephant dung is not the reward you’re looking for when you’ve just crested yet another f-ing hill in the freezing cold,” she advises. She also entertains with stories of, um, interesting people she met during races. “There was that guy in the short robe two years ago who invited us back to his house for pancakes after the race…we decided to keep running.” Funny and smart is a winning combo in our books!

    4 COMMENTS

    1. For a big guy, he has a cardio systme of steel , rapelling up and down chimneys all night. A real Weekend (Christmas?) Warrior!

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